I don't no longer know what's wrong with me. Like some of you may already know, I started my studies in a different vocational school in this August, but it doesn't really seem my thing - for sure tourism and travelling are interesting, it's not about being interested anymore. I just don't have the x-factor in me that makes me sit eight hours a day on my ass in the class, it just feels like nonsense.
Quite much every morning I go to school for a couple of hours and come back home: or I might start driving to school, but soon I turn back and come back home. And it's not just about sleeping - for sure I'm always tired and willing to sleep in the mornings - but for example today morning I woke up before seven o'clock, no problem, left to school, drove two fucking kilometers and came back. And it really makes me feel like I'm a failure, but I can't help the anguish - it's like a panic attack that's always creeping over me. And at that point it's not really about my own decision or pure sense anymore.
Also I wouldn't want to quit the school since I've already quit two different schools. Dayumn. I'm seriously thinking about calling the other school if I could jump on the media class.
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